There is nothing humorous about breast cancer.  This is based on my own personal experience and how I chose to navigate my way through this journey. Let’s talk about  “hair loss” or going bald. When I was told I would be going through chemo, I know I asked the question of many  before me:

“Will I lose my hair?”

“Yes”

“Is it possible it may not fall out.”

“No”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     OK, no Ok ,no room for discussion.  How bad could it be? 

 I thought of all the beautiful bald women in the world.  For instance, Sinead O’Connor, Sigourney Weaver in Alien 3,Demi Moore in  G.I. Jane,Natalie Portman,  Miss Tanzania 2007, Star Trek: The Motion Picture. Now it was my role coming up.

  I even prepared for the event by cutting my hair very, very, very, very short and waited for the rest to fall out….what was left didn’t fall out. OMG!  I was that one person in the world whose hair wasn’t going to fall out.

I’m sure you’ve seen the picture above, need I say more.

I was ready to be a gorgeous bald women. It didn’t take long to realize  that “hair loss” actually meant losing my hair, all of it . Including those face enhancing ones like eyebrows and eyelashes. My eyebrows were quite voluminous pre chemo so they became somewhat normal looking. Not the eyelashes though,they hit the floor or I guess somewhere on my body on their way down. I pampered them, right up until that last single lash. When they finally started growing back I found myself batting my eyelashes at everyone. Without a magnifying glass people just thought I had something in my eyes.

 I did start with a plan for my bald head .I would wear a wig. Wigs are tricky business. First :you have to get an accurate measurement of your head.

Is this with  or without hair?

 Second: pick one out.  It’s kind of like picking out a bathing suit, everyone looks great in the catalog.

The wig was a disaster.

My family  was not blessed with thick, voluptuous hair. It’s more on the wispy / fine side except for my father and brother who don’t have any hair at all.  More beautiful people.  Needless to say the wig had more hair on it than my entire family’s heads put together. The wig didn’t work out, although it was quite sassy looking. I gave it away.

 When my hair started growing back it  came with a vengeance. Wavy, soft, shiny, pretty. It was brand new.  It was  kind of like a gift for enduring, coping, persevering and keeping ones dignity.

I always tried to remain in good spirits and be happy. I’m glad to be able to look back and laugh. I can’t change anything that’s happened just my perception .

Wenonah

Last week was an interesting one to say the least. I left Portland ME on Tuesday for Las Vegas and arrived home Thursday. In that short period of time I went to my daughters wedding and gave her away. I ate Indian, Italian and Spanish meals, gambled $10.00 and came away with no more or less, surrounded myself with all the glitz and glamour of Vegas. I rode monorails, taxis, moving walkways and my feet still hurt. I flew almost 6,000 miles and was humbled by the magnificent landscape of this country.  I was hardly gone long enough to get jet lag but I feel  what I experienced was enormous.  I would do  it all again. 

Since my breast cancer I wonder about my “changed” out look  on life. How can one ,not look at life differently. I’ve looked death in the face, well maybe from a distance. Before cancer ,would I have engaged in such a whirlwind adventure? I’d like to think yes but lean toward probably not. You know all those cliches, “You only live once” TRUE “Don’t put off for tomorrow what you can do today” and so on….They have all taken on a new meaning for me. “Life is short” , do we have to experience a life threatening illness to realize it. There are lots of people who know this without the cancer.  You often hear people talk about cancer giving them a better appreciation for live and the people around them. TRUE  Although, if I could do it all again, I would opt not to have breast cancer and hope this enlightenment came to me another way.

 My trip to Las Vegas was possible only because of my loving and supportive family. I love them and appreciate immensely all their efforts to get me to my daughters wedding.

Cheryl is the short one.

My name is Cheryl I am 53 and I live in Bethel ME. This is my first attempt at blogging. I am a two year breast cancer survivor. Seems like a long time , seems like a short time. In May 2007 I felt a fairly large lump in my breast. This was just after getting the A-OK from a mammogram in Dec. In August I had a mastectomy and they removed a 3.2cm cancerous cyst. Luckily no lymph node involvement. October I started the first of eight sessions of chemo then radiation in February.  Over the winter I decided I would have my other breast removed.  I was told I had very dense breast tissue. Apparently my 10 years of mammograms didn’t help me much. Keep up the self exams ladies, no one knows you better than yourself. I decided I would have reconstructive surgery the same time as  my second mastectomy. It was a very long surgery, 11 hours My boobs are much better than the originals and I got a tummy tuck. With all that behind me it was time to move on. I felt great and was ready for anything.  So, my sister Debbie and I started a breast art project called “Boob Booty”. We create humorous paper mache breast vessels, wall art and clay women. We strongly believe that laughter and a light heart are potent healing tools. Our work is powerful, thought provoking and makes you laugh. Breast cancer is a bitch ,but I try to find humor in my experience. A friend said to me” there’s nothing funny about breast cancer”, I told him “you had to have been there”